When you realize what it's all for.

We all have that moment occasionally.

You know the one I mean. That one.

A sharp, stabbing realization that you see the big picture, even if only a glimpse and only for the briefest of moments. A break in the fog bank over our eyes appears and we see, with what can be stunning clarity, a vast expanse of knowing. Knowing ourselves, knowing the ones we love, knowing the world for what it is and what we are and, sometimes, knowing what it all means. It is a thrilling, scary, nauseating, exhilarating little stutter of the heart.

There are often precipitating events which bring us 'round about to these little seizures of focus; sometimes a hurt, sometimes a joy, oftentimes nothing more than a question that you get the unexpected answer to.

Our lives are a singularly directed, focused stream of chaos which is distilled down into an essential kernel of something true. Amidst all the running and the pondering and the posturing there is a purpose, a drive to have, to be, love. I mentioned to a friend recently that humans are delightfully complicated creatures who are all, ultimately, motivated by the same simple thing; the need to love and to be loved. Human life at its core is nothing more than a physical expression of what love truly is.

What is this, then? What is this that drove Almighty God to form us from dirt, to breathe into us the very Breath of life itself, and then to set us free to wreak havoc and pain and destruction on everything we see?

When you are willing to give your entire heart, your entire being, over into the hands of another, to see them happy, to sacrifice whatever you have to give in order to bring them a single second of joy. When God Himself was willing to yield Himself in the body of His Son to cruel death, to spill His own blood to bring us the single hope for the fulfillment of our selves, of our souls. This impulse is when you know that you've seen it.

When you realize what it's all for. To give the love our Father gave us. To break down the walls around your heart, yield your throat to the blade, and just love.

To see this love in yourself is a frightening thing, and a beautiful thing. Nothing in life really seems so important once you have been staring your own evolution of spirit directly in the eye.